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Stephanie DaughertyAmerican transgender woman who became a second mother to her daughter
Date of Birth: 01.01.1992
Country:  USA |
Content:
- From Father to Fabulous Mother
- A Father's Connection
- Sharing Her Truth
- A Daughter's Unwavering Support
- Unconditional Love
- A Journey of Self-Discovery
- Fear and Depression
- Breaking Free
- A New Dawn
- Looking to the Future
- Before her transition, Stephanie used her birth name, Michael.
From Father to Fabulous Mother
A Transgender Journey of Acceptance and LoveIn an inspiring story of transformation and unconditional acceptance, a transgender woman shares her journey from a muscular father to a glamorous mother, with her eight-year-old daughter as her "biggest supporter."
Stephanie Dougherty, 26, from Indiana, began her extensive gender transition in September 2017, finally putting an end to "torturous" years of living in a "body that was foreign" to her identity.
A Father's Connection
Before embracing her true self, Dougherty had a brief relationship with a woman, leading to the birth of her daughter, Xavia, in 2010. As a father, Dougherty developed a close bond with her child, raising her as a "daddy's girl."
Sharing Her Truth
In recent years, Dougherty felt the courage to confide in Xavia about her inner struggle. She began sharing her experiences and educating her daughter about transgender identity.
"I was trying to live as a guy and it wasn't working. My first intimate relationship with a woman resulted in a pregnancy," Dougherty recalls. "I couldn't believe it, but I was so excited and happy to be a parent."
"When I held my daughter in my arms, it changed my whole life. I couldn't describe how incredibly happy I was."
A Daughter's Unwavering Support
Dougherty's transition brought unexpected support from Xavia. She enthusiastically embraced her mother's transformation and showed an astounding level of understanding.
"I realized I am a mother on the inside, and the way I felt connected to my child made a lot of sense," she says. "We would match our leggings and paint our nails the same color."
"I started talking to her about love, and we would watch shows like 'Modern Family' that I thought could help normalize it."
"I was so nervous when I told her I was transitioning. We spent a whole day at the park, and I just told her that deep down I always felt like a girl, not a boy."
"I asked her how she would feel if I became a girl. She asked, 'What does that mean?' I explained that I wanted to grow my hair long like her mom's and wear dresses and makeup."
"She was so happy and so excited for me. I couldn't believe how Xavia reacted."
Unconditional Love
Dougherty continues, "Tears came to my eyes. She said, 'I'll love you either way you are, and I want you to be happy.' Then she started telling me all these girly things we were going to do together."
"She calls me mommy now. It's an incredible feeling. She watches me put on makeup, plays with my hair that's just starting to grow out, and brags that hers is longer."
"We paint our nails together and match our bathing suits. She stands up for me when I feel embarrassed or get nervous. Xavia is definitely my biggest supporter."
A Journey of Self-Discovery
Dougherty celebrated her first Mother's Day in early May of 2018, calling it one of the best days of her life.
"Her love is so pure and judgment-free," says Dougherty of Xavia. "The world has a lot to learn from her."
Despite always feeling feminine, Dougherty suppressed her true identity due to her family's religious beliefs. After a secret romance with her first boyfriend was discovered, she endured relentless bullying and homophobic slurs at school.
Fear and Depression
Too terrified to come out, Dougherty hid her true self away, fearing retaliation and ostracism. She describes her attempts to "force" herself to be a man as leading her to a "dark and depressed place."
She did her best to be a dedicated father after Xavia's birth, but she longed to fulfill her role as a mother.
Breaking Free
"I always knew I wanted to be a girl," Dougherty says. "When I was eight, I got caught in a dress and I told my parents I was a girl. They were very religious, so I was in a lot of trouble."
"I tried to push it down, but it was always there. I would hide girly clothes underneath my boy clothes. It was the only way I could feel like myself."
"In high school, I had my first boyfriend. When my classmates found out, they made my life hell. I was bullied every single day."
"I was terrified to come out. I never thought I would be accepted. It really took a toll on my mental health being forced to live as a man."
"I was in a really dark place. I struggled with severe depression and self-harm."
A New Dawn
Dougherty persevered, and her daughter became her greatest source of strength.
"Coming into my true self has brought me such happiness. I finally feel free, like I can breathe again."
"Being honest with your kids is always the way to go. If you're unhappy, they can sense your tension. They are as loving and understanding as you allow them to be."
"Your children deserve the best version of you, even if it means breaking gender stereotypes."
"My relationship with my daughter has never been stronger. She is my everything."
Looking to the Future
Dougherty is currently undergoing hormone replacement therapy, with plans for full gender confirmation surgery in the future. The mother of her daughter, with whom she is no longer romantically involved, is fully supportive of her transition. They continue to co-parent Xavia.
Working as a pipefitter in a male-dominated industry, Dougherty aspires to become a makeup artist and advocate for "trans parents" worldwide.
